Is twisted thinking keeping you from selling…?

The Feeling Good Handbook by David D. Burns, M.D. describes a type of treatment for depression called cognitive behavioral therapy. The word cognition means thought and this book is a common sense look at changing the way people think and thus changing their behavior.

In The Feeling Good Handbook Dr. Burns lists The Ten Forms of Twisted Thinking that occur when people are depressed. These ten forms also exist when people are not depressed and they exist within many, many sales professionals. If you use any of these twisted forms (and most of us do in one way or another) it will negatively impact your sales. I am listing the final 5 so that you can judge for yourself. Click here to read about the first 5 forms of Twisted Thinking. The following list of Twisted Thinking is paraphrased from The Feeling Good Handbook by David D. Burns, M.D.

6. Magnification

You exaggerate the importance of your (or your company’s) problems and shortcomings. You also minimize the importance of your (or your company’s) desirable qualities.

7. Emotional reasoning

You assume that your negative emotions necessarily reflect the way things really are. I am uncomfortable making cold calls therefore people do not like cold calls therefore prospecting does not work.

8. Should statements

You tell yourself that things should be the way you hoped or wanted them to be. For example, you tell yourself, “I should have made that sale.” Musts, ought to’s and have to’s are similar offenders. Should statements that are directed against yourself lead to guilt and frustration. Should statements that are directed against other people, for example, “My prospect should call me back,” also lead to anger and frustration.

9. Labeling

Labeling is an extreme form of all-or-nothing thinking. You attach a negative label to yourself or to others. Example: You make a mistake and then say to yourself, I’m a loser. Labeling is quite irrational because you are not the same as what you do.

You may also label others. When a prospect does not respond as you had hoped you may tell yourself, He’s a jerk. Then you feel that the problem is with that person’s character instead of with their thinking or behavior. This makes you feel hostile and leaves little room for constructive communication.

10. Personalization and blame

You hold yourself personally responsible for an event that isn’t entirely under your control. An appointment with a new prospect is canceled because that prospect has left the company. You think, if only I was better at prospecting, this wouldn’t happen.

Some people do the opposite. They blame other people or their circumstances for their problems. Blame doesn’t usually work very well.

Bottom line for all 10 forms of Twisted Thinking… Twisted Thinking does not help you sell.